If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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