u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
