At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.