yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
