so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
