One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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