i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Randomize