The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
