apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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