I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
This baby is an asshole
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Randomize
