i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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