I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
