3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize