His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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