The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize