at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize