Barsexuality is the new black.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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