i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
