In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
