Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
