NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Randomize
