You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
