I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize