So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
