im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
