He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
