Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Vodka?
Forever.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
this hospital has no fireball
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
