Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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