wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
