I want to walk on stilts...naked
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Randomize
