Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that