Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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