3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
He kissed a someone with a penis
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
