I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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