Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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