I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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