based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I know her cup size but not her name....
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