For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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