rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I need a burrito and a hug.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.