Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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