is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Small penises have feelings too.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Randomize
