a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize