yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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