hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
