I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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