I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize