Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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