Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Life without a bra equals bliss.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
