he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
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