I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize